Raising your game

It had been a terrific day in so many ways. The bride had turned up on time, the ‘I do’s’ and ‘I will’s’ all came out in the right order, the sun had radiated its’ beams on cue and the parents of the bride had come out of the day without administrators filing for their bankruptcy. To top off what had been a great wedding, a Ceilidh had been arranged into the wee hours of the morning. (for those who are not sure what a Ceilidh is, imagine lots of rhythm-less  people trying to follow a bearded man shouting out complex instructions, involving intricate footsteps and body movements – all accompanied by fiddling folk music!).

Our kids had lasted well - stuffed with more buffet food than is surely good for them and fizzing with E numbers from their steady stream of soft drinks. But now they were ready to drop and they required a little assistance from dad in order to make their way to the car before a long drive home.

We normally keep quite a strict routine in our home regarding bed times and this was certainly a significant exception - one that has often been referred to. In fact whenever a late night was proposed in the following years, they would ask the question ‘will it be later than the wedding?’ The exceptional late night experience had set a ‘benchmark’ – something they would use for years to come in order to measure true lateness.

Benchmarks can be such experiences that set a standard – a standard that ‘things’ either rise to and exceed, or fall short of and miss. They create definition of what we would either like to achieve or avoid – articulating our hopes and expectations. We all create them - benchmarks that set ‘our’ standard.

I enjoy playing the piano and I’ve played in various bands (although I lacked the foot tapping skills for a ceilidh band) over the years. In some of these bands I may have been perceived as one of the stronger musicians – possibly a benchmark? I would try and help others in developing their musical abilities in order to see their standard rise. But I was in danger – I had reached my own standard and was consistently satisfying my own expectations. Complacency, mediocrity and apathy often lurk around the corner in such circumstances and all of these become a real anaesthetic in our lives. I needed a new benchmark!

I remember feeling my jaw dropping as I looked on in amazement at the piano keys being played at super speed at a Jools Holland concert – it was so inspiring. I had never seen the piano played in that way before. I also remember feeling astounded when I began to play with some professional musicians who were light years beyond me in their ability. They pushed me and made me feel like a learner again but it was good - So often feeling like a ‘comfortable pro’ can be more dangerous than feeling like a ‘developing learner’. I valued the ‘L’ plates that I had reapplied and knew that the impending sedative of complacency was gone – a new benchmark had indeed been set.

Maybe there are others who consider ‘us’ to be their benchmark of Christian spirituality. They look on desirous to learn from our example, hoping to rise to the heights they may have perceived in us. Maybe we’re aware of the way they look to us and so do all we can to assist them on their journey. It’s good to realise they are there and look in their direction. The apostle Paul in 1 Corinth 11:1 faced all those looking up to him and said ‘Follow my example’. For many this missionary journeying, faith filled church planter had become their benchmark.

But Paul wasn’t complacent. He goes on to say ‘Follow my example as I follow the example of Christ’. Despite all his achievements, all his acts of adventure, all the crowds who hung onto his words, Paul had another benchmark – the person of Christ Jesus.

Does your benchmark needs raising? Do you need to be in the presence of a higher standard? Can you see a pacesetter ahead of you? Ask Jesus to renew your vision of him and reveal a new level through others who are ahead of you in their Christ following journey. Don’t let complacency create a premature finishing line in your life – there is more of the journey to travel.

Take a Break!

I’m often found sampling the great British tarmac on motorways across the country. Some of them feel more like car parks at times but given the choice I would probably prefer to drive in a morning traffic jam than I would on a late night empty road.

Dark roads, tired eyes and engaging late night radio ‘phone ins’ were all fine a few years ago but something has changed.  I may start out ok as the adrenaline is still flowing from the previous meeting and my mind is captivated with gratefulness to God for impacting lives. But as the journey progresses and the clock on my dashboard creeps into the early hours of the morning, my eyes begin to feel sleepy.

My ‘sat nav’ reminds me that I have a further two hours of travel to complete before I creep into my sleepy home and I begin to think of some strategies that could hold back the onslaught of tiredness. I move a few dials on the heating system and the fans begin to throw cold air into my face – it has a momentary effect on me – I sit up straight in my seat and begin to focus clearly but quickly the windscreen begins to complain that it’s not getting enough warm air and refuses to remove its internal fog of condensation until I meet its need.

The heater is turned back on and compensated for by opening the driver’s door window. As the two temperatures battle it out, the monotony of unlit roads, the waning adrenaline and the fact that I’ve had too many early mornings and late nights begins to grip me once again. I’ll put some loud music on – I’ll sing along, who in the world has ever been able to sleep when loud music is being played. It works and as I look at the predicted length of the remainder of my journey I see I only have 1 hour and 55 minutes to go.

I notice that my singing is more of a slur now – maybe what I need is a stimulating news item on the radio. I scan through the channels and find something mildly interesting to engage my mind. I sit up straight in my seat once again and begin to think of the issues I am hearing. I’m moved by the sad stories, inspired by the heroes contained within but within seconds I feel my eye lids getting heavier and realise that I didn’t really hear any of the last few sentences.

‘Tiredness Kills’ I read – ‘take a break’. The next services are five miles away and I must stay focussed till I get there. I find a bag of sweets, bought earlier at the fuel station and begin to chew on them in the hope of an energy rush from the sugar. I feel a rumbling under the tyres as I realise I have verged too close to the hard shoulder – services only 2 miles to go.

I’ve never been so glad to indicate left and pull into the deserted car park of an overpriced facility. The sweets, cold air, radio debate and even the questionable practise of slapping myself in the face were unable to break the impending sleepiness. What next – should I lay my seat back and sleep for a little while? Should I purchase multiple shots of expresso? I conclude there is a time for everything – and right now it is time to sleep. I recline in my seat, close my eyes and lay there enjoying a quiet rest away from the stresses of driving.

It may not be a late night drive for you – it may be the sluggish pace of your work in the office or dulled thinking in the classroom. You may feel like you’re not matching up to your own aspirations for being alert and sharp. God ordained that within the rhythm of our lives that there should be times when we pull over and take a break. We all need to have times when we withdraw from the stresses and strains and draw on Gods refreshing within our lives. Maybe that’s what you need right now.

After a 30 minute snooze in the car and a strong coffee I set out on the remainder of my journey, reinvigorated, ready and renewed for the next stage of my journey.

Simple words with special outcomes

The day had seemed longer than it had actually been and now my feet were aching. I wanted the shopping trip I was accompanying my wife on to finish. I didn’t want to entertain another moment of browsing and regular glances at my watch communicated this clearly.

‘Just one more shop’ I heard, but I was sure I had heard that somewhere before. We walked into the local branch of a famous department store and headed towards the counter of a well known skin-care range of products. The atmosphere was alive with an intoxicating mix of scents and the staff all wore their multiple layers of foundation cream very well. ‘Can I help you?’ a friendly voice enquired.

My wife began to take her up on this offer of assistance and I could tell from the direction of their interaction that this could be a long visit in this ‘just one more shop’. Another member of staff joined in and my wife seemed to be in her element having two people help her spend money. I may have had one eye on the approaching expiry time of our car park ticket but I couldn’t help but be impressed by the way these two shop assistants were engaging.

I pointed at my watch and nodded at my wife and she knew it was time to bring this shopping fest to an end. She picked up the items she wanted to purchase and the two staff accompanied her to the till where she paid for them. I was looking forward to retrieving the car without any penalties when my wife threw a spanner in the works. ‘Would it be possible to see your manager please’ she enquired of the staff. My hopes of a swift exit were dashed and the two staff members looked perplexed, even worried. Had they done or said something wrong?

They put a call out for the manageress who arrived with her ‘shield and armour’ ready to face the barrage of another customer complaint. ‘I just wanted to commend your staff’ my wife said. The ‘shield’ dropped and a sense of the unexpected could be felt. ‘In all my years of retail work, I have never come across customer service as good as I have experienced from these two members of your staff today – I just wanted to say thank you’. It was a lovely moment and I could tell it had made their day. As we exited the shop for a very brisk walk to the car I commended her for doing such a lovely thing.

When we arrived back home I could hear my wife on the phone in the next room. She was now phoning the head office of the department store giving the names of the two staff members and lavishing praise on them for their excellence. The lady on the other end of the phone in the customer services department expressed that she had received lots of complaining calls throughout that day and was feeling quite affected, but that ‘this call’ had made her day.

The following week we were visiting the store again and as soon as we walked through the doors, these staff came towards us and gave us a big hug. One of them began to share some of the challenges she had faced recently but when she came into work at the beginning of the week, their names were printed on the wall of the staff room with a congratulatory message. With tears in her eyes she said ‘that is the nicest thing that anyone has ever done for me!’

The bible encourages us to ‘Let our conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt’ (Col 4:6). Christians can often be perceived as judgemental, complaining and highly skilled at articulating what is wrong and while there may be a ‘time for everything’, there is definitely a call for each of us to ‘season our conversation with grace’ and look out for opportunities to communicate the taste of Gods grace to others.

We’ve had some great conversations with these staff and we’ve had further opportunities to share the love of God. We don’t believe this story is quite finished yet...

But it’s a story that wouldn’t have started if I had followed my tired feet. The story began with my wife being a blessing by seasoning her conversation with the inspired grace of God. We can all be too busy, too self absorbed, too concerned with our own demands and aware of our own ‘tired feet’ and miss the opportunity to start stories. Let’s reach beyond ourselves and offer encouragement and blessing to others. Wouldn’t it be amazing if we were known for the traces of grace that we leave behind in every conversation?